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1999-12-26 - 21:26:55
Jenny and I just got back from Toledo. We went there to celebrate Christmas with her family.
I have to say, it was one of the nicest Christmases I'vehad in years. Lot's of family. Everyone nice. Tree, opening presents on Xmas morn. Good food. Nice.
My parents divorced when I was 5 or 6. We had moved to Oakland, CA, then my dad asked for a divorce. They got divorced, and my dad moved back to Chicago. We stayed on in Oakland for a couple years. My mom couldn't find work, finally she gave up and we came back to Chicago too.
We moved around a lot within the city. I stayed with various relatives, but mostly with my mom. I saw my dad every Sunday, pretty much.
I lived with my dad my first year of high school. It sucked. I moved back with my mom.
I found out my dad was gay when I was about 10. I guess I wasn't too shocked. I told my best friends. They didn't care too much either. I worried about other kids in school finding out. But they didn't. Not surprising since me and my small group of friends were pretty much outcasts as far as the rest of the school were concerned. Of course we were part of a clique. The burnouts. If you've ever seen the ABC TV show "Freaks and Geeks", we were the freaks. "Freak" was slang for "burnout", "head", "stoner". You know, the kids who hung out in the parking lot, or the athletic field and fired up some doobies. Can't remember much of my Sophomore year. That's okay, I think it sucked anyway.
That would have been the school year 1976-77. Ever see the Fox TV show "That 70s Show"? I can totally relate. Uh, that is, in an inner-city, latchkey-kid, single-working-mom's kid sorta way. Never had a Vista Cruiser, though. None of my friends had cars, at least not the ones my age. Older brothers sometimes had beaters. Hyde and I would have gotten along I'm sure. I was a lot like Eric though, so I guess that's only right. In fact, I had my own Hyde. His name was Murphy though. He was a Marxist-Leninist who swore Albania was the only true communist state on the face of the earth. He used to drive me crazy spewing communist rhetoric and forcing me to listen to ALL of Led Zeppelin or Jethro Tull ALL of the time. No mixes. Just one album at a time over and over, depending on which group he was obsessing on. In 8th grade there was an embarrassing Barry Manilow period. But hey, I had my Elton John period, so I guess we're even.
I hope Murphy's doing okay. I hope he's not dead. I hope he's grown up. (actually, I hope he's found Prozac, 'cause from a layman's point of view, he's definitely depressed and obsessive/compulsive. But hey, we all have our tendencies, so I guess we're even again)
Oh, so my point was, when I was in my yout' Christmas was pretty much a pain in the ass. Dad and his lover would have Xmas eve, dinner, open the presents, etc. My mom would be there usually, and my mom and dad would try not to hate each other out loud.
Then my dad fell in with his last lover, who he was with for over 25 years. So Christmas became pretty routine. Bill's (my dad's lover, and my third parental unit) family would all come over, my mom, friends of the family (John and Sheldon(who are lucky enough for gay men to still be together, after some 30 odd years)) and we'd have the usual family dramas, etc.
Of course as a teenager, and a twenty-something, you sit around just hating that kinda stuff. But by around twenty-five or so, you start to appreciate it. When you can drink with the rest of the adults, and your dad starts taking you seriously, or at least more seriously, things aren't so bad. Soon you sorta get hooked on it.
Christmas Eve 1986 my mom died after some pretty serious complications from Diabetes. Christmas sucked pretty much for a few years after that. Later on, Bill died of AIDS. Soon it was down to me and my dad, and John and Sheldon. Not the big crowd I was used to. Kinda bleak.
Now my dad has moved down to Florida(?!).
But this year I went home with Jenny. It was pretty nice. Jenny's family is so great. I like her dad a lot. Her mom's pretty darn nice, and her brother's a real good guy. Her Aunt Mary's family is really nice too. I just love her family. It felt good to be amongst all those people. The good food. NICE presents! And when people did their normal family stuff. Yelling at each other, or getting pissed. It rolled right off my shoulders. There was a time when that kinda stuff would paralyze me with embarassment. Not any more.
...and to all a good night. Note: this entry seems kinda choppy, eh? It's a testament to the fact that Netscape 4.61 for Linux isn't exactly up to snuff yet, is it? 4.7's coming down the pike. No, I'm not gonna use vi to edit my diaryland page!
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So, how do you like them apples?